the anger parade's beer

Peroni Nastro Azzurro

2010-01-10T08:11:00.005-08:00

Come over here. Smell this. Skunks. Skunks must have shat in my bottle of Peroni. This stuff must come from the same school as Grolsch. The only academy I know of that encourages its pupils to smell like a garbage dump. That said Peroni isn't actually that bad. In a lot of ways I liked it but felt like I'd had this before in a different bottle, with a different label... It's been done before. Better.

Mike's Rating:

Red Tail Ale

2010-01-10T08:11:00.003-08:00

Do you remember that night? Maybe it was the only night you'd ever let yourself have with her. Maybe it was the only night you ever could have had with her. You remember the bricks on the wall. The people around you rolling their eyes with mock jealously. The only thing they're jealous of that its you and not them. And when she begged you to go home with her the smile you and told her no.

Well that's this beer. Its a good feeling even if you pee hurts in the middle of the night. Red Tail. All the things you wished you'd done in a bottle.

Mike's Rating:

Kingfisher Premium

2010-01-10T08:11:00.001-08:00

You ever gotten up to pee and when you got back your beer tasted suspiciously like cigarette ashes? But you're not one to throw out a beer, especially one that cost you more than half of what your hourly wage is. So you drink it. You drink it trying your damnedest to keep you eyes off her tits all the while feigning interest in whatever she's rambling about. Well, I've got news for you if were drinking Kingfisher. It was probably just that patented stale taste of Kingfisher Premium Lager. Drink up. It tastes like yesterday.

Mike's Rating:

Carlsberg Elephant

2010-01-10T08:10:00.001-08:00

Why does every beer taste like this? It seems a waste to pay more for an import that tastes like a whole line of domestics.

Once when I was in Seattle I stuck my neck out and went to an Indian dinner with my girl at the time. The one thing that made me stomach what I had just eaten was the lone bottle of Elephant. Vegetables. Curry. Coriander. Elephant was the switch to my inner garbage disposal. For that I am thankful.

The beer on its own is a blur in the millions of others. Surprisingly enough its a Malt Liquor but you'd never have noticed it until I told you.

Mikes Rating:

Rogue: Dead Guy Ale

2010-01-10T08:09:00.001-08:00

One bag of Cheetos too many. Thats what ruined this beer and it was no fault of its own. That was on me.

There is a bar in Austin called the Drafthouse. Its a old style pub with tons on tap. All the tables are thick wood that over the years have seen their fair amount of abuse from Thursday night college crowds and five o' clock thirty somethings alike. Some of my favorite memories of Austin came from that place. The first time Jason and I hung out we met up there. I schooled Amber in darts. Mike schooled me. I celebrated the Vandals win their this year. When it came time for Wade to leave thats where we saw him off. And if it hadn't been for that bar Amy and I wouldn't have found our apartment. And on top of all that the bar tenders are constantly comping me free pints.

Thats what this beer tastes like. It doesn't matter that it comes from Oregon. It tastes like the Drafthouse. All of it. Even the lock on the bathroom that doesn't do the one thing its supposed to. Lock.

Mike rating:

Young's Luxury Double Chocolate Stout

2008-09-30T20:41:00.000-07:00

According to the bottle, "Here at Young's we've created a family of flavoursome [sic] ales with different styles and tastes, united by a common belief that good ale, brewed properly and with passion, can be enjoyed by all." Amen, brothers. My first thought was that this stuff actually tastes a little like chocolate, unlike most other "chocolate" beers. It must be the "double." This is a thick, rich beer that will fill you up after about a quarter of a pint, but has a smooth, Nes Quick powder flavor that will keep you drinking 'til the bottles gone. It's not super strong, weighing in at 5.2%, but it's a good dessert type beer, or if you just feel like having one. But who ever just wants one?

Wade's Rating:

Sparks

2008-07-16T21:19:00.000-07:00

My best friend used to get excited to visit Texas, partially because that meant she could buy Sparks. With that in mind, I bought a four-pack recently and expected to be blown away. This drink lures you in with the novelty of the Alcoholic Energy Drink that (an email informed me) contains the equivalent of three beers and eight cups of coffee. That said, I managed to get two and a half down in as many hours, and I felt nothing out of the ordinary. The taste is certainly nothing to compel one to drink it. Energy drinks are good, and alcohol is good, but combined, they taste (as Michael put it) like a sweet tart in a can...but not in the good way that you might imagine. Definitely not worth a second try.

Amy's Rating:

Ace Pear Cider

2008-07-16T21:05:00.000-07:00

Mike got this pear cider at the Draught House one night after we'd already had two beers apiece. I had a sip, and it tasted like too-sweet white wine. It's probably best to start the night out with this one, as having it after other beer is somewhat sickening. Also makes an excellent choice for those who haven't yet developed a taste for beer, or for those with Celiac Disease.

Amy's Rating:

Redbridge

2008-07-03T17:44:00.000-07:00

Good beer are refreshing. Good beers are made from sorghum? Surprisingly they can be. While on another seeking employment adventure I came across what I presumed was a tasty red. I really need to start reading labels... It did end up being yummy however even if it was made without wheat or barley. I was honestly surprised how good it was. So if you feel like passing on the gluten, give it a shot.

Mike's Rating:

Belhaven: St. Andrews Ale

2008-07-03T17:33:00.000-07:00

There were a hundred different reasons I got this one. New Saint Andrews, I enjoy Belhaven brews for the most point, hell even the fact it was a product of Scotland was in play. It never occurred to me that it was a golf beer even though it said as much on the bottle... I really enjoyed it. So try it. Don't watch golf though. And don't tell me that Tiger Woods is an athlete, I don't want to hear it. Drink your beer and shut up so the rest of us can enjoy ours.

Mike's Rating:

Taj Mahal

2008-07-03T17:26:00.000-07:00

The first time I had this was also my first adventure with Indian food. In comparison to the food, Taj Mahal was pretty good. I had a chance to revisit it recently and had a change of opinion. Granted it won't ever make you smell like curry and then proceed to push you away all night because of said smell. And I bet it won't get all pissy when you bring it to light that it was her idea that you went to that shit hole in the first place... No. It won't do that.

I liked the healthy buzz it provided but I just don't feel its anything special.

Mike's Rating:

Woodchuck Granny Smith Cider

2008-06-18T08:56:00.001-07:00

To sum things up, this is the best beverage I've ever tasted. Made from Granny Smith apples (I'm assuming), it has the sweetness of a cider without being overwhelmingly saccharine. It has a curious flavor that keeps me interested, and an alcohol content that keeps me happy. If Woodchuck were to figure out how to make a diet version of this drink and put in it in slightly more work-appropriate packaging, you can rest assured I'd be spending half of my per diem allowance on these at least five days a week.

Amy's Rating:

Mike's Review
I definitely enjoyed this cider. Not only was it yummy but was also free. Its hard to argue with that. My one big gripe about ciders is that they are usually too sweet to be able to drink enough of them to get thoroughly hosed. That said its taking a little restraint to not drink the remaining three in the fridge right now. So drink up, you won't regret it.

Mike's Rating:

Mississippi Mud

2008-06-15T19:45:00.000-07:00

I remember this tasting better in Idaho. I don't know why a few states would make any difference but it did. I like the jug, it reminds me of better days. Even that isn't enough for me though. I don't plan on buying this again.

Mike's Rating:

Sparks

2008-06-10T18:59:00.001-07:00

This was a mistake. Cute idea putting an alcoholic beverage in what appears to be a battery. Except when that said beverage actually might be mistaken for battery acid. Seriously, have you EVER seen anyone finish a six of this stuff? I have good money that said unless they're tweakers and used to that kind of strain on their heart they're dead now. And if they're not, than I bet they wish they were. If you honestly feel like you need a little boost before a night of drinking, moderation people. One'll do you just fine.

Mike's Rating:

Hoegaarden witbier-biere blanche

2008-06-10T18:39:00.000-07:00

For all the talk of the mysterious white beer I honestly had to google it before I realised I was drinking that Hoegaarden. The shit is good. It's a little light for me but it has some very interesting tastes going on. Some people say its a mix of coriander and orange peel but I like to think theres a little taste of hoe in every bottle.

Mike's Rating:

Lizard Head Red Ale

2008-06-10T17:14:00.000-07:00

I can't say the stuff is bad. Its just another Red that is smooth enough for you to get through the over sized bottle with little complaint. It comes in handy if you are busy moping around a strangers house while wearing nothing but your under britches.

Mike's rating:

Samuel Smith Oatmeal Stout

2008-06-09T16:46:00.000-07:00

I enjoyed this one a lot. It was rich, smooth, and great tasting. Of the three I tasted on Saturday, this one is the only one I'd buy again. The only bad thing is since its a stout its very filling, so even though I really liked it, I could only drink one.

Jen's Rating:

Kennebunkport Blueberry Wheat Ale

2008-06-09T16:17:00.001-07:00

I'm not completely sure how I felt about this beer. It has an after taste of blueberry, was interesting in the beginning, but after about half way through the beer, the aftertaste lingers and makes the beer seem sickly sweet. So much so that it ruins the rest of the beer. I tend to like wheat ales, with apricot or pumpkin, but the blueberry wasn't one of my favorites.

Jen's Rating:

Kirin Ichiban: Special Premium Reserve

2008-06-09T15:56:00.000-07:00

I wasn't very impressed with this "Japanese" beer. Its brewed in America by Anheuser Busch, and pretty much tastes like a Budweiser, which I don't like. If I had already had a couple of stiff drinks before hand, this would have been fine to maintain a buzz, but for initial taste and enjoyment it blew.

Jen's Rating:

Mike's Take:
In a way I hate to agree with Jendar on this one. It isn't that I doubt her beer review its just that I had had this a long time ago and thought I enjoyed it. Of course I was in Hawaii drinking way before PM and eating sushi. I guess when Kirin didn't interupt my drunk I figured it was good. Well I now stand corrected. It wasn't that good. It tasted like a sub par domestic and even the dragon on the bottle can't change that.

Mike's Rating:

Celebrator: Doppelbock

2008-06-08T10:47:00.001-07:00

Now here's something that doesn't happen for me very often. More rare than finding fifteen dollars in quarters in the middle of the street, and a lot more awesome than some old lady giving you her number when you visit L-town. A perfect score. I have been wanting to try this beer for quite a while but the price had kept me away. I mean honestly its a lot easier to drink fifteen cheap beers than drop the same money for a six of good beer. At least that's my experience. The value I place on quantity is directly influenced by my time spent in Oklahoma... I like Celebrator. Not only for the little goat toy thingy I get with each bottle. It has a smooth rich taste that will leave you wanting more.

Mike's Rating:

Red Rocket Ale

2008-06-08T10:37:00.000-07:00

If you have been to Austin you might have been to the Draft House. Sometimes they make a home brew called the double red. Its so strong they limit you to two glasses. Somehow one night Amber and I ended up with a pitcher of the stuff... Now that was a night. That aside this beer is the closet I've come to finding something that tastes like that home brew. It isn't nearly as strong which makes it a whole lot easier to finish. Suprisingly this might come in my top three reds I've ever had behind the Red Menace made by Hales Brewery and the before mentioned Double Red.

Mike's Red:

Murphy's Red

2008-06-08T10:32:00.000-07:00

I can't say I'm impressed. It isn't bad but it definitely isn't special. If it didn't say red on the bottle I'd have a hard time believing thats what I was drinking. This one might be worth skipping.

Mike's Rating:

Liberty Ale

2008-06-07T20:09:00.001-07:00

Drop anchor. Prepare to drop trow. Liberty Ale will call port in the nearest toilet before you can remember why Kim Kardashian is famous.

Mike's Rating:

Orval Trappist Ale

2008-06-02T13:45:00.001-07:00

Did you know they call them killer whales not because they are whale that kill but because they kill whales? This beer comes in like chum. Not chunky, but heavy girl. The first sip was a little rough but once the initial shock wore off I found myself enjoying this dark brew. Maybe you'll enjoy it. I mean Tila Tequila has a show...

Mike's Rating:

Chapeau Kriek

2008-06-02T13:42:00.000-07:00

I'm not depressed. I'm actually relieved. This falls in line with a lot of the other limbic brews. This one had the flavor of a cough drop. Not necessarily a vicks, more like a ludens. More like candy than a cure all. I'd drink it more if it didn't cost six dollars a bottle. I'll allow it this one time though. I came back from a 0-20 deficit against USC to rally Idaho to a 20-21 win with no time left. If you're gonna drop the kind of cash it takes to drink fruity beer then you might want to get your head examined. or your sex.

Mike's Rating:

Tecate

2008-06-01T12:05:00.000-07:00

What can I say but whats been said before. A wise man once told me it tastes like cigarette ashes. That can't really be true because my neighbor drinks an inordinate amount of the stuff. Its just a cheap beer. It's a Mexican cheap beer in a red can with a little black eagle. That's what it is. So if you want to drink it you can but you'll die of gaunasia.

Mike's Rating:

Shiner: Hefeweizen

2008-05-23T11:35:00.000-07:00

Its not the kind of beer you'll find me drinking very often, except maybe when my roommate is nice enough to offer one. I got on a Hefeweizen kick a couple years ago but I can say I'm relatively clean now. Sometimes I can feel the itch and I have to call my sponsor... But I can control it. It won't hurt to have just a little. But I can't! But I did! And now I'm giving five dollar slap jobs in the alley behind Dress for Less.

Mike's Rating:

Lindeman's Framboise

2008-05-18T15:56:00.000-07:00

I feel a little ashamed saying this but I really like this stuff. Amber ordered it but I drank more than my fair share. The Framboise was Raspberry but they make several other flavors and if they're anything like this stuff they are worth picking up. If you run fast your local bar might give you a free collectors glass with every purchase.

Mike's Rating:

TsingTao

2008-05-18T15:52:00.000-07:00

TsingTao or ChingDao as its known on the street, is actually one of my more favored beers. It falls in the realm of Mickeys when it comes to explanation, because there is none. It is an average beer that falls in line with most of the other Chinese beers I've tried. But it comes in a green bottle and it is Chinese... That's all I really need.

Mike's Rating:

Jason's Review:
Tsingtao, or urine as it's known by me, tastes immensely like watered down ass. It is a light beer, with the body of a lager. Now, I generally don't drink a lot of lagers, and beers like this are the reason. There is no hoppiness, it is weak and a little flavorless, and it leaves an awful aftertaste. It's like a party in mouth and everyone hasn't showered. In short, I didn't remember this beer being so shitty.

Dos Equis

2008-05-09T06:09:00.001-07:00

I have a friend. A silly friend. Lets call her Andi. Lets also suppose this is her favorite beer in the whole wide world. From this we can conclude two things about said friend. One: Shes nuts. Two: She has bad taste. Okay maybe we can't say that about Andi because she knows terrible things about you. So instead we say Dos Equis isn't that bad, however it is not the end all of beers... but I'll totally buy you a six pack to keep you on my good side...

Mike's Rating:

Belhaven: Wee Heavy

2008-05-09T06:00:00.000-07:00

Granted I had been drinking for a while when I got around to busting this open but I liked it. It wasn't as strong as I was hoping. I thought "Wee Heavy" would mean "put me on my ass." That didn't happen. For the price I'll try something else next time but overall I do enjoy a lot of the Belhaven beers.

Mike's rating:

Bitburger

2008-05-08T15:53:00.000-07:00

Bitburger is a good beer. I wish I had more to say than that. Um. *Cough* Well... This is one of the few beers recently to break my PM rule. Amy was still in her pjs when I bust out this bad boy at 10:15 on a Saturday morning and I didn't regret it.

Mike's Rating:

Tiger

2008-05-08T15:49:00.000-07:00

I enjoyed Tiger for the taste but probably more for the gas station down the street selling it for $4.99 a six. That is an excellent price. It fits the beer perfectly. If it was a penny more I wouldn't buy it. That being said grab some when you get gas before I buy it all.

Mike's Rating:

Hamms

2008-05-08T15:44:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure what it is about Hamms that upsets people so much. I'm not sure if its 'cause it looks like a can of peas or what. Hamms is a fine cheap beer, the main trick is finding the stuff. Then, I guess finding someone else to drink it with you.

Mike's Rating:

St. Peters Cream Stout

2008-02-23T10:01:00.000-08:00

St. Peters Cream Stout was something I picked up to dull the pain a bit of an impending douche. It didn't really help and the guy ended up leaving me alone for the most part. Rodney was there though, and as this was right before I moved to Seattle, he kept telling me to keep my head up out there. I thought it was just general advice but when i asked him about it, he said it rains a lot out there and makes people sad... Okay so the beer was pretty average and theres a part of me that little piece of my liver back.

Mike's Rating:

K Apple Cider

2008-02-23T09:56:00.000-08:00

K. K is an apple cider that I picked up on a trip with Amber a while back. She remembers it being really strong but it doesn't roll in any higher than most stuff. Honestly I can't remember much about so try it and let me know so you can help my memory.

Mike's Rating:

Fuller's Vintage Ale

2008-02-21T19:19:00.001-08:00

I'm not exactly sure what makes Fuller's Vintage Ale different from its less special counterpart but it did come in a nifty little box. It also cost me more than a normal beer which I don't mind, if its worth it. I can't say I ever felt like this was worth it but it was awful by any means.

Mike's Rating:

Well's Banana Bread Beer

2008-02-21T19:14:00.000-08:00

Well's Banana Bread Beer actually sort of tastes like Banana Bread. That's about as much as I can really say about it. It in no manner granted the super powers I am accustomed to from my usual alcoholic beverages.

Mike's Rating:

Murphy's Stout

2008-02-21T19:10:00.000-08:00

Murphy's Stout is a delicious dark beer that I often drink in place of Guinness down at the Draught House. I find it a lot smoother and far less likely to give me a hangover in the morning.

Mike's Rating:

Lone Star Light

2008-02-21T19:04:00.000-08:00

Lone Star Light. Christ... Although regular Lone Star has grown on me a little bit since I've moved down here even Amber won't finish an entire can of Lone Star Light.One time when I was with Angel I drank most of Nickie's beer and then filled it with water, as if she wasn't going to notice. Really all I had done was save her the drive to Texas to pick this crap up.

Mike's Rating:

Aiko

2007-10-11T08:43:00.001-07:00

I can't say it tasted like anything special but it knocked me on my ass like no other beer has done for a while. This Lithuania brew comes in at an unbelievable 9.5 which is just enough to second guess why you thought you should end your night with it. The company that distributes it swears it'll warm you up. I'm definitely not disputing that but I'd like to know who's gonna be the one to pick your cold dead body off the pavement.

Mike's Rating:

Snow Cougar

2007-10-11T08:41:00.000-07:00

The first words out of my mouth were "wow thats good" sortly followed by a meaty taste which made me rethink my first statement. Snow Cougar in my own personal opinion tastes like salsbury steak day with that glue gravy they used to give us. Which I guess which would make it a step up from those sissy sandwhiches in a bottle I'm used to. Is it supposed to taste like this? It has a giant white cougar on it though and for that I'll drink it.

Mike's Rating:

texas sux beer

2007-10-11T08:29:00.001-07:00

Texas Sux Beer and Texas Sux wine were produced to cash in on the rivarly between OU and Texas. Big Stick brewery is located Krebs, Oklahoma which luckily knows a whole lot about sucking. They managed to bottle every last ounce of it into the beer that in true Oklahoma fashion, weighs in at a hefty 3.2. We Okies wouldn't have it any other way..? It wasn't a terrible beer but I won't be buying it again. It gave me a headache and Josh and I were unsure if the bottles were actually 12oz or not.

Mike's rating:

Evil Eye (Ojo Malo)

2007-09-13T19:55:00.000-07:00

Evil Eye is a surprisingly fine malt liquor that packs a wallop. It comes in at a hefty ten percent alcohol which is strong even for a guy like me. You really don't taste it 'cause if you try real hard Evil Eye sorta tastes like Hornsby Cider. Now if I only had an adventure lined up tonight this flavor experience wouldn't go to waste.

Mike's Rating:

Miller Lite

2007-09-13T17:53:00.000-07:00

Suprisingly I'd never had Miller Lite until my recent trip to Austin. I figure if the commish is enforcing its consumption it couldn't be all bad. It really isn't anything special in my eyes and I actually had a hard time drinking it exclusively for that night. I'll split a six with you, but you are taking the extras home.

Mike's Rating:

Lone Star

2007-09-13T17:45:00.000-07:00

Lone Star is texas's very own shitty beer. While most beers are made by unionized workers I have this secret belief that Lone Star is made by illegals and the mentally disabled awaiting execution...

Mike's Rating:

Side Pocket

2007-09-13T17:36:00.000-07:00

Once when we were young we thought our dreams could be real. My dream was to find a beer which could be consumed hot. As I get older the realization occured that I may never complete my quest. Side pocket hot is like being punched in the throat while swallowing cough syrup. It isn't fair to write a review on a beer I only tried hot but life isn't fair son.

Mike's Rating:

Hacker-Pschorr Weisse

2007-08-21T11:43:00.000-07:00

This beer is really pretty interesting. It has a texture simular to Mac and Jacks African Amber and is a lot heavier than the hefeweizens I have had previously. I was told that Hacker-Pschorr Weisse has a sixty/forty blend of wheat and something or another... It doesn't really matter whats in it. I mean, really?

Mike's Rating: 2.5 out of 5

Harp

2007-08-21T11:35:00.000-07:00

Perhaps you need to be in the right state of mind but Harp has been a favorite of mine for sevaral years now. Maybe its that underdog image it carries for some due to the popularity Guinness holds. I was once told the only reason Harp was created was in order to make black and tans. I mean thats gotta give you a complex. Well I love you just how you are Harp.

Mike's Rating: 3 out of 5

Miller Genuine Draft

2007-08-16T14:48:00.000-07:00

I'll have to admit that I was a little skeptical about this stuff. My only real experience with MGD was as a kid my mom used to keep a couple of 'em in the fridge. I asked why she did that since I never saw her drink beer and she said it was so that in case anyone every broke into the house they'd know a man lived there. Don't ask me the rationality behind this, I mean they would have had to already broken into the house and I have my doubts the watch beers would chase them off. Regardless of its lack of intimidatability it isn't really that bad of a beer. I've even heard a few say that it might even ranked up there as the king of lawnmower beers. I'm not sure about all that but overall it could be much much worse.

Mike's Rating: 2 out of 5

Sapporo

2007-08-16T14:41:00.000-07:00

Don't let the big gold quality star on the can fool you, this ain't no value right beer. Sapporo has been a friend of mine for a long long time. I like their cans that sorta look like eight inch shells. It is a very smooth beer but it doesn't come out feeling like a lite (light) beer at all. Yummy Yummy!

Mike's Rating: 3 out of 5

Mickey's Ice

2007-08-12T18:24:00.000-07:00

Unlike it's delicious counterpart, Mickey's Ice lacks everything that makes Mickeys Mickeys. Light on flavor, M.I. tries hard to act like the lawnmower beer it never was. You just can't be what the good lord didn't put in you, even I know that.

Mike's Rating: 1.5 out of 5

Big Bear malt liquor

2007-08-12T18:18:00.000-07:00

So it isn't fancy or high brow. It lacks the sophistication many looking forward to in a beverage. What it does have is a big fucking bear on the bottle! And that's really all it really has. Although, I had a good time drinking on it. It is just another cheap malt liquor, but hey, who said there is anything wrong with that?

Mike's Rating: 1.5 out of 5

Rainer

2007-08-12T08:35:00.000-07:00

No its not a near beer and in all honesty its not really that bad. I had been led to believe that Rainer ranked up there somewhere between Alabama swamp water and those liters of urine Russ used to keep under his bed. In fact Rainer has inspired me to make new section on the beer page, and no. It isn't called crappy beer Mike likes.

Mike's Rating: 1.5 out of 5

Zywiec

2007-08-07T20:10:00.000-07:00

Zywiec is a tasty little polish beer that a pretty little polish girl gave me. Then she swore at someone and went outside for a smoke. The beer itself is pretty smooth and comes with a little beer thermometer on the back of the bottle. I guess that means its out of the running for the quest for the ultimate "Hot Beer?"

Mike's Rating: 3.5 out of 5

Old Rasputin

2007-08-07T14:28:00.000-07:00

Talk about a dark beer! Christ this stuff will knock your socks off and replace them with cement tennies. While I enjoyed Old Rasputin I can't say that I would necessarily drink it again at least not willingly. Some of you beer snobs like your beer the consistency of tar. That's your choice but when you get cancer of the garsnuckle I don't wanna hear any complaining.

Mike's Rating: 2 out of 5

Hales Brewery: Red Menace

2007-08-07T14:24:00.000-07:00

The Red Menace is a extremely red beer made in Seattle Washington. I first had it a couple weeks back and it helped make the night. I can't really talk about anything that happened but lets just say its one of those nights people talk about for a while. Or they would, if they could. If they weren't all dead.... Or... *Cough* It's lovely weather we're having here wouldn't you say?

Mike's Rating: 4 out of 5

St. Pauli Girl

2007-07-31T21:33:00.000-07:00

St. Pauli Girl is an above average pale ale that goes well with a soccer game. Don't ask why but when I watch futbol I yearn for the stuff. It is one of those imported beers that doesn't feel like an import. And, it has a pretty little lady on the front, you just can't beat that.

Mike's Rating: 2.5 out of 5

Pabst Blue Ribbon

2007-07-31T21:29:00.000-07:00

This ain't no bull riding association, its cheap yummy beer. You could roughly estimate that forty plus percent of my body is now made of PBR. I will drink Pabst out of a can or bottle, but the bottle always makes it taste too watery. The way to go is straight out of the tap. If you can get them to pour it into a big ass mason jar, you won't regret it. It is also an excellent writing tool. I went to college, I know.

Mike's Rating: 3.5 out of 5

Mickeys

2007-07-31T21:24:00.000-07:00

Mickeys. The best beer ever. Okay now I know that isn't true but I like to believe so. It's a belief as strong as the faith Cubs fans hold that they may ever win a world series. Or maybe, a better comparison would be a Marlins fan. Everyone thinks they suck but all six fans know how good they are, they have two titles for god sake! So drink Mickeys. Drink lots of it. I take baths in the stuff and wash my face with it. You should too, it might clear up that ugly mug of yers.

Mike's Rating: 5 out of 5

Coors

2007-07-31T12:44:00.001-07:00

I like Coors. I'm somewhat ashamed to say so, but it makes me hit home runs. Now I'm talking about Coors, not that wussy light stuff. It's never been mean to me or told me my ideas were stupid. It's never spent my money on shoes or paint pens. No, me and Coors have a strong loving relationship.

Mike's Rating: 2 out of 5

Pilsner Urquell

2007-07-31T12:43:00.000-07:00

I like Pilsner Urquell. It's a little more bitter than how some people like their beer. I'm not sure when American's decided all their beer needed to taste like water but I must have not got the memo. I wouldn't want to drink this stuff everyday, but I might have to 'cause I bought a lot of it. I wish there was a way to have an Anger Parade beer exchange. Jenny and I used to talk about putting together a AP beer sampler, I just don't even know how to start since everyone lives so far away...

Mike's Rating: 2 out of 5

Wells Bombardier Premium Ale

2007-07-31T12:42:00.002-07:00

Wells Bombardier is yummy and smooth. It was exactly what I needed to calm down after the confusing, crazy night in which I procured it...

Mike's Rating: 4 out of 5

Red Stripe

2007-07-31T12:42:00.001-07:00

Once, long before the recent advertising campaign, this drunk mom came up to me in the store and started asking me whether or not she should buy Red Stripe. I will tell you now what I told her then, "Hey girl what's going on. Yeah you should buy it, but not before you give me that number." It led to a three month affair that probably took a couple months off my life. And this scar... Drink Red Stripe responisibly and always in moderation.

Mike's Rating: 4.5 out of 5

Warsteiner: Premium Dunkel

2007-07-31T12:40:00.000-07:00

Now I'm not sure what a Dunkel is but it can't be healthy. But who worries about their health nowadays anyway? Christ, I eat fried catfish and orange soda for breakfast. Warsteiner Premium Dark is a solid darker beer that is rather smooth going down. I would probably pass in favor for another beer if I was drinking dark, but there are some who don't feel that way at all.

Mike's Rating: 3 out of 5

St. Pauli Girl: Special Dark

2007-07-31T12:39:00.001-07:00

Waking up is hard to do, that's why I start my day with St. Pauli Girl Special Dark. For a beer I almost passed on as some sort of gimmick it is pretty awesome. It tastes a lot like they just threw in some brown sugar in their beer, but I ain't complaining. It's delicious. Plus I got this friend Justin who loves brown sugar, wink wink, nod nod, if you know what I mean.

Mike's Rating: 4 out of 5

Ziegen Bock: Amber

2007-07-31T12:34:00.000-07:00

Brewed exclusively for Texas, Ziegen Bock is a treat. Again it isn't necessarily a beer that I would want to slam all night but for those who enjoy flavor then you will enjoy this. I am partial to Amber's and while I can't say that this is the best ever, it definitely got my attention. Although as I near the end of the bottle I am now feeling physically ill. I should have know this would happen... Texas and I have never really gotten along, but poisoning my beer is low even for that excuse for a state. Go build another prison and leave me to my beer...

Mike's Rating: 2.5 out of 5

JW Dundee's Honey Brown

2007-07-31T12:27:00.000-07:00

JW Makes a good drink but I'm not sure if I'd call it a beer. At 4.5 there isn't much to really feel. It is good though and the bottle is metal which could be handy if you have a car that runs on tin. Or you eat it. Because you are a robot... The Honey Brown is the kind of beer that you could drink to wash your mouth out with after having something stanky like Camo. I have a hard time believing that I could finish a six of the stuff though. If you see this and just want something mild (or you in fact ARE half machine) then by all means pick it up.

Mike's Rating: 3 out of 5